How To Win An Argument Without Making Enemies

28 ott 2019
2 020 286 visualizzazioni

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Sometimes arguments can get heated and spiral out of control. So while we all want to win an argument, not making an enemy in the process can be even more important.

Which is why today we’ll be looking at Trevor Noah and what you can learn from him about coming out of verbal scruffs not only on top, but looking cool calm and collected.


0:28 - #1: Sub-communicate that you're not there for a fight.
3:46 - #2: Ask questions instead of making statements.
6:39 - #3: Confidently defend yourself without coming across as antagonistic.

#TrevorNoah #CharismaOnCommand

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  • Talk loudly while they are talking and talking louder than the target will be an instant ko

    Holy slap with da swordHoly slap with da sword8 ore fa
  • As i watch this video, I realized that eventually these things become unconscious decisions that don't require too much brain usage.

    Landon MalickLandon Malick3 giorni fa
  • As a leftist -- I did all this, I tried and tried and tried, and then I got exhausted. Ppl are too propagandized; the cognitive dissonance is through the roof. So I just keep quiet these days. And this to me is the real enemy of progress -- the mental and emotional exhaustion of attempting to reason with people that hv been brainwashed. It's sad and scary.

    ladybugmerringueladybugmerringue3 giorni fa
  • Jesus Christ I hate Trevor Noah 😂 he’s practically a foe intellectual. If you pay attention to what he says a majority of the time, he can easily tell that he isn’t open to really hearing you out. I agree that he does come off as calm, cool, and collective, but dude is a verifiable moron.

    TheQuilava96TheQuilava963 giorni fa
  • Many people who lived in violent area are pretty good at de-escalation.

    Shooting BricksShooting Bricks3 giorni fa
  • Man, your videos pack so much value. I have watched so many of your videos so many times, because I feel like if I was able to incorporate all your tactics into my daily life, I would be a much better/more effective/happier person.

    dreaminginnootherdreaminginnoother3 giorni fa
  • My mum always said: yes, but means no When we were arguing😂 So I am gonna show this video to her to retroactively win all my arguments!!!

    dragonslayer2255dragonslayer22554 giorni fa
  • I love Trevor Noah as a comedian, storyteller, and a person. And if you learn something from an argument you didn't lose.

    Jennifer AndersenJennifer Andersen4 giorni fa
  • After reading all of the comments and to be perfectly honest in my humble opinion without being sentimental of the course and without offending anyone who thinks differently from my point of view, but also by looking into this matter in distinct perpectiveand without condemning anyone's view and by trying to it objectified and by considering each and everyone's validly don't have anything to say. Thank you, come again.

    natty boynatty boy5 giorni fa
    • Hi. I suggest that your post will shine if you edit it to get rid of writing errors. Right now though, it's tarnished by those errors.

      Leah NYCLeah NYC4 giorni fa
  • Sometimes it is better to agree to disagree and "Walk Away"! The real point is, you don't have to associate with someone you would rather not be around, it will save you heartache and frustration. Why try to argue and be miserable doing so? Why not be around those who you truly enjoy being with and when you are with each other you feel inspired vs. tired? Let your vibe attract your tribe!

    RebelShelRebelShel5 giorni fa
    • Hi. That's a fine approach for optional ppl in one's life, but not fine for relatives and neighbors. With those groups, it helps to understand self, and learn ways to create and traverse bridges of understanding.

      Leah NYCLeah NYC4 giorni fa
  • Charisma on Command: Becoming Human

    Xander Underwood'sXander Underwood's5 giorni fa
  • Trevor Noah is a pro at just using technique and no substance. Which means he's going to be likeable in argument without ever bringing up any facts or actual knowledge. Impressive.

    MrUnlimitedTorqueMrUnlimitedTorque6 giorni fa
    • Disagree. I find much substance in his presentations, have been watching him mostly during the pandemic.

      Leah NYCLeah NYC4 giorni fa
  • People need 2 first learn the art of listening.

    Thulani MbuthumaThulani Mbuthuma6 giorni fa
  • "Take a deep breath as you are about to speak", and we see the worst Star Wars character *ever* ... I took a deep breath... Freak, they ruined SW...

    Nana PerNana Per6 giorni fa
  • I disagree with the Trevor Noah analysis, the snippets only show tomi being aggressive but omit all the instances where trevor interrupts and make jokes at his opponent's expense. He also has a habbit of bringing up a point that makes his opponent look bad and then changing subjects immediately after. I watched the entire interview with him and tomi and got a totally different impression. He didn't seem at all genuine and seemed to be more concerned with making his opponent look bad than really debate. That's my opinion at least.

    Tshepang MokoenaTshepang Mokoena7 giorni fa
  • I do agree with people almost never being evil but a certain diabolical narcissism has become pervasive today that can be perceived as maybe JV evil. Social medias such as twitter and facebook have reinforced a false persona for an astonishingly large amount of people.

    Ethan HuntEthan Hunt7 giorni fa
  • If only my own family could learn these principles of good and productive behavior. Dreading going home for xmas. haha

    Ethan HuntEthan Hunt7 giorni fa
    • Good luck. Relatives can pose an almost existential challenge. You can choose to succumb, to submit, to avoid, in order not to vanquish or be vanquished 8n argument, disagreement, dislike, what have you. But then that very effort can verge on self-vanquishing, which can do harm to one's self, if not consciously regulated. Of course, if family is super toxic or physically endangering, then one must save one's self, one's life, first of all.

      Leah NYCLeah NYC4 giorni fa
  • The shampoo bottles in my shower are gonna be so impressed!

    Ali OssailyAli Ossaily7 giorni fa
  • To all the comments about encounters where techniques like these don't work: those are valid points, but at the same time, not the majority of interactions. People are almost never evil. And another thing about people? They tend to respond to the way they're treated.

    Janne PeltonenJanne Peltonen7 giorni fa
  • Sadly the people who need to hear this the most will probably never watch it

    Alex HamiltonAlex Hamilton7 giorni fa
  • Good video! Just correct the spelling of ‘Deminish’ to ‘Diminish’.

    Kalesh MahendrakarKalesh Mahendrakar8 giorni fa
    • Hear, hear, my friend!

      Leah NYCLeah NYC4 giorni fa
  • The v-necks on this guy is such an eyesore. He should wear crew necks.

    Jayanth KumarJayanth Kumar8 giorni fa
  • My grandmother figure (not biological or adopted, just fulfills the societal portrayal of the grandmother) once told me that she saw some of Trevor's stuff when he was still performing at small scale shows. She said that she could tell than that she was going to become a national icon. Not sure if she knew that he would move out the country, spread his influence and be this good at debates. Remember that this man was just a comedian. I love his intelligence and humour.

    He Who Must Not Be NamedHe Who Must Not Be Named8 giorni fa

    • @Harshita • S OK,THANK YOU!!

    • From what I can understand, it's an environment in which you only encounter people with similar ideas and beliefs like yours, instead of having people with opposite ideas and beliefs.

      Harshita • SHarshita • S7 giorni fa
  • The only way to win an argument is not to argue according to Dale Carnegie.

    Robert LeonardRobert Leonard9 giorni fa
  • I do this and it definitely works. The other perosn either looks really aggressive and someone else comes to diffuse the situation or they relate they are getting carried away and they simmer down

    InternetDork101InternetDork1019 giorni fa
  • Trevor Noah? Trevor Noah is your example of someone that argues well? Are you high?

    Space VenturaSpace Ventura9 giorni fa
  • In other words, be honest, humble, and loving. Broad and oversimplified, I know, but directionally correct, right? I mean, if we are genuinely interested in others, without judgment or any desperation to be right and holding a logical confidence in our view we should win any debate; or otherwise leave with stronger convictions of a new viewpoint.

    Devin PoolDevin Pool10 giorni fa
  • "The goal is not to be right, but to get it right." Amen! This video was spot on. Very inspiring and true. Keep up the good work, Charisma on demand.

    vestborgelevvestborgelev10 giorni fa
  • @CharismaonCommand I can translate it into Turkish. Love it!

    Ezgi aksakal;Ezgi aksakal;10 giorni fa
  • Pathetic when you act all emotional during an argument. Only beta people cant control their emotions.

    Juai nott?Juai nott?10 giorni fa
  • This is so important, especially now where there is so much political division. I’m a dem who has recently become reacquainted with old friends who are trump supporters. I actually love the discourse between myself and people with opposing views, and these techniques will certainly help to diffuse arguments when they become heated. Thank you!

    Laura KobetichLaura Kobetich11 giorni fa
  • but nowhere along the way should you change your mind. ;}

    Spruce_GooseSpruce_Goose11 giorni fa
    • actually I've changed my mind

      Spruce_GooseSpruce_Goose11 giorni fa
  • Trevors not a good example to use

    jmiogojmiogo12 giorni fa
  • Jordan Peterson is far better at winning arguments than Trevor Noah purely on the basis of picking one's battles.

    Scott HarrisonScott Harrison12 giorni fa
  • Uhhhh Trevor Noah is a brainless and brainwashed human being who has no valid arguments in anything. He’s simply a patronising parrot who says the right sound bites.

    JuliaJulia12 giorni fa
  • 4. Don't be funny.

    Son GokuSon Goku12 giorni fa
  • Thanks for making me a better communicator.

    Ancient RuinsAncient Ruins13 giorni fa
  • Trevor is outstanding at discussion but i disagree with him on virtually everything

    Dan ObrienDan Obrien13 giorni fa
  • 10:17 - Diminish, not deminish.

    James HoadleyJames Hoadley14 giorni fa
  • But no one know what sound at 6:26? And maybe you can hear only with headphones

    Ainul FadlanAinul Fadlan14 giorni fa
  • Too bad everything that comes out of his mouth is dogshit

    TIMSHKYTIMSHKY14 giorni fa
  • Are you not gonna mention the power of his dimples ?

    Lebohang MachabaLebohang Machaba14 giorni fa
  • Trevor is mot fighting nut is a master of racial propaganda, which is dangerous

    Christopher DANIELChristopher DANIEL14 giorni fa
  • Holidays are right around the corner so u best believe I’m taking notes. Ps5 is on the line 🙏🏾

    Habesha AtheistHabesha Atheist15 giorni fa
  • Dub in hindi

    urban cultureurban culture15 giorni fa
  • I like your videos🎥👌👌👍👍

    kasuku mcheshikasuku mcheshi15 giorni fa
  • ... Lol every time I argue feel wrong but I can't explain

    Blassom EmpressBlassom Empress15 giorni fa
  • I wanna see Trevor debate Ben Shapiro

    roger narwenroger narwen15 giorni fa
  • Unfortunately, Trevor flipped pages

    Keith DangKeith Dang16 giorni fa
  • Thank you so much. I realised a lot about how I handle arguements.

    Afolabi TaiwoAfolabi Taiwo16 giorni fa
  • Trevor sux

    42042017 giorni fa
  • R u still looking for a German dubber of your Podcasts?

    Steven KamashiSteven Kamashi18 giorni fa
  • Be more like Trevor. Never be like Shapiro :)

    steveshufflesteveshuffle18 giorni fa
  • Is it weird that all of those come to me completely natural and I've been using them since forever ?

    Obsidian NebulaObsidian Nebula19 giorni fa
  • the america i won, lets make america great agen

    hating killshating kills19 giorni fa
  • You think Trevor Noah doesn’t make enemies with his arguments? The dude is a moron with everything he says.

    Milantique StudiosMilantique Studios19 giorni fa
  • Trevor Noah's a sack of sh/t sellout to the Elites... Good example moron.

    Russ GodinhoRuss Godinho19 giorni fa
  • Sure youtube recommend this 3 years from the actual.

    kevin kibetkevin kibet19 giorni fa
  • Very informative video,I will be watching it over n over, thanks for post

    Kaku AroraKaku Arora20 giorni fa
  • Try this with flat earthers

    abdelrahman al hattoabdelrahman al hatto20 giorni fa
  • 10:50 onwords🔥🔥

    yax shahyax shah21 giorno fa
  • This guy is really detailed in the way he explains every thing

    Bosa MetseemeBosa Metseeme21 giorno fa
  • so in the intro with Ben, what were the implications?

    raiyan rezaraiyan reza22 giorni fa
  • No this is not a good argument. Not everything is an echo chamber. If you look at real honest intellectuals they constantly expose themselves to different opinions and arguments. Look at the Atheist Experience for example. They majority or their callers are theists l

    KkriKkri22 giorni fa
  • My "yes and" is: "exactly, but"

    Rajir Ray WilliamsRajir Ray Williams22 giorni fa
  • I wouldn't be surprised if he becomes the next president. We need more men with class like Trevor.

    Christian MantalaChristian Mantala23 giorni fa
  • I wonder if this got more views before or after the election results?

    K.S. P395K.S. P39523 giorni fa
  • My psychology tutor use to say An academic argument is based on the subject and not the person. An argument is a heated exchange between said people. -Both can be used recieved and dished out-

    Crazy_Lew 90Crazy_Lew 9024 giorni fa
  • Noah is a bell-end. Tomi ,well, is Tomi.

    BobBob24 giorni fa
  • As people get more frustrated, they have a tendency to raise their voices and talk faster. - Ben Altman

    Pankaj MadwanPankaj Madwan25 giorni fa
  • Softly and slowly, crack a joke, ask genuine questions, repeat their beliefs in a genuine way ask questions that probe for inconsistencies

    Sidra KamalSidra Kamal25 giorni fa
    • See something that you relate to, the job of an argument isn’t to be right but to get it right

      Sidra KamalSidra Kamal25 giorni fa
  • I despise Trevor Noah, but he is great at arguing

    Noah ENoah E25 giorni fa
  • Still can beat mbak Nana Indonesian journalis in debate, she is way more better than Trevor Noah

    Sadvika SumarsonoSadvika Sumarsono26 giorni fa
  • Think a better example here is Jordan Peterson. Trevor’s a show host so it’s more planned

    TJ SherpaTJ Sherpa27 giorni fa
  • Did y’all vote?

    David jordanDavid jordan28 giorni fa
  • Using an angle of "attempting to understand" in your questions, facial expression, and body language can go a long way in disarming whomever you are arguing with

    e ge g28 giorni fa
  • Everybody is chocolate 🍫

    Dennis TshifhumuloDennis Tshifhumulo28 giorni fa
  • So that is why I agree with NOTHING this guy says but I somehow still like him.

    Joe JoeJoe JoeMese fa
  • Not try a flex but I did most of these things already but I did also get into arguments with ppl that have similar viewd on a number of things do it came to me naturally, I have also noticed that most of the "smart" people at my school would get heated in an argument (not with me but with other ppl) Like if you have had the same experiences in any od the above jut Wanna know

    Omar KansohOmar KansohMese fa
  • Some people doesn't like to be questioned .. they think we get details what u think about that

    Keerthana_ NightingaleKeerthana_ NightingaleMese fa
  • Who else is researching for the next time they argue with your parents you? Also who else wants to be able to cracks joke like Trevor, but just can‘t

    Anselm GademannAnselm GademannMese fa
  • Weird! Everything about Trevor pisses me and everyone I’ve ever met off. He comes off as a pompous sniveling child. Absolute dislike this guy.

    Brian MurphyBrian MurphyMese fa
  • Perhaps this is a culture thing... but as a South African who has watched Trevor Noah for many years I can hear how disingenuous and condescending he sounds in these clips. He is not trying to diffuse the situation, he is just trying to make the other person look inferior.... he plays a lot on words but is actually spinning half truths to make himself look superior and apparently based on this video and the comments below it works...

    Amelia FreundAmelia FreundMese fa
    • And to add... perhaps listen how he speaks with people he agrees with vs those he does not to understand the difference in tone

      Amelia FreundAmelia FreundMese fa
  • i like method what buddha taught in an ancient

    Maheshg KIPLMaheshg KIPLMese fa
  • "People's egos get caught up with their argument."

    QA QAQA QAMese fa
  • I can’t be the only one who sees how weak and lame Trevor is

    hoody hoohoody hooMese fa
  • The best way to win an argument is to avoid it. Enough.

    Pe2-RockPe2-RockMese fa
  • This piece did not age well. Lately, Trevor Noah just gets worse and worse every time he opens his mouth. Maybe he'll go back to normal when the election's over, but I won't bet on it.

    Retro-Matic GamerRetro-Matic GamerMese fa
  • i watch your videos to become a better human

  • Bruh, Trevor is a massive douche bag. Should have used a different person to use as an example.

    ShapesShapesMese fa
  • my pe teacher assigning us to watch this video and me using it to get out of other assignments

    Abe Bueno de MesquitaAbe Bueno de MesquitaMese fa
  • I love love love Trevor Noah he really carries himself with such poise and intelligence.

    Elia SalamancaElia SalamancaMese fa
  • Let's start a debate

    Atharva JadhavAtharva JadhavMese fa
    • Anyone?

      Atharva JadhavAtharva JadhavMese fa
  • Trevor Noah is a bad example. Being snarky and condescending while saying nothing is not winning an argument.

    The Office ShopThe Office ShopMese fa
  • Purple eyes for Jehovah and Hades ya!😃😀👑😃

    Leila-Leader Nambinga-LeaderLeila-Leader Nambinga-LeaderMese fa
  • When Khaled Popped Up!!!!

    Checks CacheChecks CacheMese fa
  • Law 9, win though your accomplishments, never though argument. Yes, now the nose looks JuST rIhGt.

    stevenstrumpf7stevenstrumpf7Mese fa
  • Noah is not funny but yeah his trick works good.

    No Chips Only CrispsNo Chips Only CrispsMese fa
  • Thanksgiving's coming up, I've gotta be prepared...

    Andrew FitzgeraldAndrew FitzgeraldMese fa